The Value of Dropping Trou
July 22, 2005 – 12:08 amThis post wowed me. Made my jaw drop.
As a fan of genderfucking in most forms, I’ve become quite expert at spotting female-to-male transsexuals: most of the time they’re short men and if they pass for male and are cute, they’re easily mistaken for gay men.
Or jockeys…..
That’s a compliment given the whole "too-cute-to-be-straight" assumptions we all make. And whenever I see an FTM who looks convincingly male, I want to shake his hand. Okay, I confess, it’s more like, I want to throw myself at his feet.
Which reminded me of an ex’s step - mother who convinced herself I became a man because I’m 6′2. In her theory being this tall as a woman was too hard for me to bear, which provided the impetus to become a man.
This ranks as one of the top three reasons why people tell me I’ve transitioned.
What saddens me are those who think that taking testosterone supplements will instantly make them handsome. Ladies and gentlemen, if you are not attractive in one gender, switching to the other won’t help.
Hmmm. Not sure FtMs transition to become handsome or not. I certainly didn’t. But then I don’t think this blogger cares two cents worth about complexity.
But her comments did get me to thinking about normativity in FtM communities. There is an expectation that we will be short and maintain something of a high pitched voice, and be white, too. When we are not any of these things, we sometimes don’t get seen or read as FtM by other FtMs.
I’ve certainly had experiences where non-FtMs tell me I could never be a transsexual; or, they ask how long will it take before I become a woman. I shrug my shoulders and attribute the statements to lack of experiences with FtMs.
But I still find it strange and a bit shocking when other FtMs give me attitude or act like I’m lying when I tell them I’m FtM. Still I suffer from this belief that we should know better by now, what with all the I’m-more-super-real-than-you wars.
But we don’t. Know better, that is.
So from now on I think I’ll just say, "Let’s drop trou. And see who is the bigger FtM."
2 Responses to “The Value of Dropping Trou”
>>What saddens me are those who think that taking testosterone supplements will instantly make them handsome. Ladies and gentlemen, if you are not attractive in one gender, switching to the other won’t help.>>
Ugh. What a horrible person.
This got _me_ thinking about how one of the clearest indicators of second-class status is that others feel entitled to turn your appearance into a matter of their gratification. This is like the trans-specific version of Roeper’s fatphobic rant about the Dove models.
No, I didn’t transition to become more attractive. No, ftms in general don’t transition to become more attractive. I was, however, absolutely terrified of being “ugly.” What I now realize is that I was using “ugly” as code for being on the receiving end of the kind of demeaning bigotry people like her love to spread around. “Ugly” for worthless, lesser, freakish.
Oh, and Ms. Genderf***er? Wanna take a second look at how gender-normative those beauty standards are?
By piny on Jul 25, 2005
Soeaking of the original piece, to which you so thoughtfully linked, this has to be one of the most ignorant posts I’ve read in a while, and that’s saying something since I read blogs most every day. SARCASM ALERT: I am so glad the writer exhibits one of the most base stereotypes of bisexuals, namely that we are “connoisseurs” of the human body for which our appetites know no boundaries. Way to set back an entire segment of the community, both with queers and with heteros, by focusing solely on your need to sexualize other peoples’ bodies.
Echoing Piny above, “UGH”, indeed!!!!
By Jennifer Gee on Jul 26, 2005