Archive for September, 2005
Friday, September 30th, 2005
I've been hard at work on cash flow statements and breakeven analyses.
This,coming from a man who had his Ford Contour repo'd several years ago (with mucho sex toys in the trunk ~ but that's a different story...)
I'm pleased that Eli J. VandenBerg [1] will be published by Homofactus Press. Homofactus will also be publishing Self-Organizing Men [2].
Eli's book will be titled Adventures in Boyhood.
Both Adventures in Boyhood and Self Organizing Men will debut in 2006, the Year of the Dog.
[1] http://adventuresinboyhood.blogs.friendster.com/adventures_in_boyhood/
[2] http://jaysennett.typepad.com/jay_sennetts_blog/2005/06/call_for_submis.html#more
Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments »
Thursday, September 29th, 2005
Perhaps that's not the best title/attitude to have about this weekend...but it's what keeps coming to mind.
I'm laying in bed at 1:30 am, thinking of all the different ways I could say what I need to say....how do I say them while keeping people open to me? to the process? to possibilities?
This weekend, I am going with a team of four down to Colorado Springs, CO, home of Dr. James Dobson and Focus on the Family (and some other 9,000 Conservative Christian Organizations). We are going down with our team to present to two churches from my mainline protestant denomination about the "Discernment Process." What we are trying to do is to get them to commit to a 10 week process of discerning what they believe is the will of God about LBGTs in the church.
Posted in Queer | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, September 28th, 2005
[1]
Oh.My.God.
[1] http://jaysennett.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/03/i-cant-believe.jpg
Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, September 27th, 2005
I just read a news story at 365gay.com http://www.365gay.com/newscon05/09/092705angTG.htm [1]and it's making me weep. The first transsexual priest is about to be ordained in England, and here's what their version of neoncon hate is spewing:
The Evangelical Alliance - the organization of conservatives in the Church of England - called it "blasphemy".
"[The Bible is] absolutely clear that God created human beings as male and female," said Don Horrocks, a spokesperson for the group.
"Therefore there is absolutely no Christian acknowledgement of the 21st Century human idea that it's possible somehow for a person to take charge of their own destiny and to decide what their own sexuality is. Someone who does that... is therefore actually perpetuating an illusion or masquerading and any Christian is clearly not going to be supportive of someone who purports to be what they're not," Horrocks told the British Broadcasting Corporation.
Once again, a frightened, ignorant majority is dictating to the minority what is and is not real. And once again, this ignorance is conflating transsexualism with sexual orientation.
What I wonder is, how does Don know what's in God's heart? And how do Don and others of his ilk reconcile this hateful position with their brand of Christianity? How is it possible to reconcile profound hatred with professions of love?
Christians out there, please help me understand this one, because I am at a loss as to how to communicate with "people of faith" who use their religious beliefs as underpinnings of bigotry, prejudice and hatred.
[1] http://www.365gay.com/newscon05/09/092705angTG.htm
Posted in Anti Assclownery | 8 Comments »
Tuesday, September 27th, 2005
[1]
[This image is free. Use it in good health. Just note that the blog link should be: www.jaysennett.com [2]]
[1] http://jaysennett.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/03/the-pain.GIF
[2] http://www.jaysennett.com/
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Sunday, September 25th, 2005
Several weeks ago I interviewed Joan Lipkin [1] the Founder and Producing Artistic Director of That Uppity Theatre Company [2] in St. Louis, Missouri.
I spoke with her as one artist to another. I have learned much from Joan. Theatre construction plays a huge part in why artists with certain types of physical impairments don't get theatre work. And then there is the urinary segregation people with mobility impairments live with.
What is commonly seen as accessible, is not.
I have also learned the disability is not a metaphor. For anything. And words like blind, lame, spastic, retard, retarded and deaf make those of us who use them to describe moral or ethical failings look like first graders learning to write and speak English. (Though I came to this place on my own.)
I thank Joan for taking time out of her busy, busy schedule to interview her. And my pal Eli Clare for first introducing to disability cultures.
Rather than excerpt her interview I've decided to publish it. Not enough conversations exist around disability, art making and political activism.
What follows is Joan Lipkin's bio, then the interview.
[1] http://jaysennett.commailto:JLipkin@aol.com
[2] http://www.uppityco.com
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Friday, September 23rd, 2005
As my lovely partner and I slogged our way through another early-morning Michigan commute today, I remarked to her for no particular reason that I should blog about the ignorant things people have said to me over the years once they knew I was bisexual, and that I never want to hear again.
So here it is, for your early weekend amusement, Jennifer Gee's Top 10 Most Ignorant Things People Say to Me Because I'm Bisexual in order of annoyance factor (NOTE: it's not only, as John Waters has called them, "those filthy heteros" making these remarks):
10. Are you a lesbian now since your partner is a woman? [HINT for the challenged: NO!]
9. You just want it all, you greedy slut!
8. You're just afraid to come out.
7. There's no such thing as bisexuality.
6. You're a "fence-sitter" who makes our community look bad.
5. It's just an excuse for an unnaturally overactive sex drive.
4. You can "pass" for straight, so you're not really queer.
3. Everyone's bi - in college.
2. Can I watch you and your partner in bed?
and the winner (loser) is...
1. Which one of you plays the man???
Now go forth, and be educated. Happy weekend!
Jennifer
xxoo
Posted in Queer | 4 Comments »
Thursday, September 22nd, 2005
Last night I and the Lovely Ms. H. watched the conclusion of Martha Stewart's Apprentice show.
She dismisses the loser with "You just don't fit in."
"Fit in?!" I declared. "No wonder dudes* get into trouble with chicks+.
DUDE*: 'I don't fit in?
MARTHA: Yes, I'm sorry. You just don't fit in.
DUDE*: So do I still have a job?? [NOTE: He does not. But Martha needs to write him a letter to tell him he's fired!]
How about this related scenario:
DUDE*: So you're saying we're just not compatible?
CHICK+: Yes that's it.
DUDE*: Can we still go out??
"But she didn't say I was fired/we shouldn't go out anymore," the Dude* says later. "No wonder he didn't fit in/we couldn't go out anymore," says Martha/Chick+. "He just didn't listen very well........"
* DUDE = Dudes of All Genders.
+CHICK = Chicks of All Genders.
Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments »
Wednesday, September 21st, 2005
to:
Ona Marae
Nick Kiddle and
Jennifer Gee
for posting excellent words.
(Now I must convince them to continue to blog here every now and then. They make me write better!)
Connections. We live in and through them all the time. Every moment we live on earth.
They make life matter. Few people know who we are and fewer even care about us. Those who care make my sun rise.
Those who make my sun set chat and don't do. Talk and don't walk (or roll or scooter).
I thank Ona, Nick and Jennifer for doing what they said they agreed to do. When I needed them to do it.
Accountability, agreeability and follow-through. Rare qualities possessed by three shining gems.
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Tuesday, September 20th, 2005
I still await deployment by the Red Cross.
The scope of need boggles the mind.
200,000 + survivors living in Red Cross shelters over 27 states.
500,000 + meals per day served by Red Cross volunteers and paid staff.
85,000+ volunteers serving the needs of Red Cross clients.
40,000+ additional volunteers needed to meet the immediate needs of survivors.
[Note: The Red Cross still provides services to survivors of the Oklahoma City bombing.]
The Red Cross responded to the aftermath of Katrina by changing their volunteer policies. Previously they only deployed long standing volunteers of one year of more to federal disasters. For Katrina they have trained, and are training, spontaneous volunteers. Since late August, the national office changed the training manual nine times to meet the changing needs of Katrina survivors.
The Red Cross expects to have had over 1,000,000 face-to-face contacts with survivors.
Flexibility remains a value I struggle with. Yet stability arises from flexibility. Standing upright, I fall over when I force myself to remain rigid. When I relax and stay flexible and let my body sway with my breathing I remain upright.
The Red Cross' flexibility allows them to save lives.
My biggest epiphany: I cannot claim bragging rights for assisting survivors through a hardship deployment while letting my home responsibilities slip. I remain accountable to my family and my choices and my ethics.
I cannot let go of small things in lieu of greater glory. Tasks needing completion in the present call for action. Hardship deployments, no matter how wonderful and necessary and extraordinary, remain in the realm of the future.
How I do anything is how I do everything.
Posted in Anti Assclownery, Katrina, Truth | Comments Off
Monday, September 19th, 2005
Domestic Violence can be a life shattering experience. Living with a disability is a challenge. Put the two together, throw in systems that are not equipped for that intersection and you have a problem that grows by leaps and bounds.
One out of five women have a disability. Many are hidden in our communities, but they are there amid their families and caregivers. Abuse rates for women with disabilities may be as high as 85%. There are many reasons that a woman with disabilities is more likely to be a victim of domestic abuse. A woman with a disability may well depend on her abuser for personal care. She may not have had any sex education and may have a harder time distinguishing appropriate and inappropriate behavior. Women with a disability’s choices are often not respected, so her “NO” doesn’t mean “NO.” Women with disabilities fear punishment, such as loss of care, medication, home, disability aides, and so threats or demands for secrecy are made. She may be less able to resist or get away from her abuser physically. This can be due to her own limited mobility and the fact that many DV shelters cannot take her or that specialized care arrangements would need to be made. Women with disabilities are often isolated, which includes a lack of support system and friends. Finally, the woman with a disability faces a negative social value of being inferior or disposable; a belief that allows many abusers to think the abuse is permissible.
If a woman with a disability does report or tell someone, she faces many barriers. Her caregiver may be her abuser. If so, she will be denied information and access to help services. The wide range of disabilities means there is no distinct “group” and so there is no “one size fits all” policy or one easy way to access all of the women who need help. DV workers may not be educated about the issues facing women with disabilities and disability workers may not be educated about DV issues. There are service gaps between disability agencies and DV agencies, and there are few studies and statistics on women with disabilities and DV, so those gaps may not be obvious to the agencies. One positive thing to remember is that based on Criminal Codes 18-6.5 101-106,(in Colorado) abuse, exploitation and neglect of an “at risk adult” (which includes women with disabilities) are felonies with severe penalties.
In Denver, Colorado, we are lucky to have an agency that takes over the intersection of disability and DV. The Domestic Violence Initiative for Women with Disabilities was formed in 1985 to provide assistance through peer support, education and awareness, resources, self-advocacy, and other relevant services. They help women with disabilities access already existing DV resources and serve as a liaison between those women and agencies. They also present training to service providers and the general community on the issues of DV and disability. We are very lucky to have them with which to work.
(Our thanks to DVI for some of this information and to The Better Health Channel for additional information.)
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Friday, September 16th, 2005
"What do you know, and when did you know it?"
Some of us remember that rallying cry from the Watergate years, and still others of us are being newly introduced to this phrase, thanks to the nomination of ultraconservative John Roberts to the Supreme Court. But an email I received yesterday sent me down a different path of introspection.
I work at a major University, and through that I am a member of a local volunteer speakers' bureau, whose mission is to educate people in the surrounding communities on GLBT identities, lives, relationships, politics - you name it. We are encouraged to share as much of and about ourselves as we feel comfortable doing. The program is based on the nostrum that by showing ourselves as real people with the same concerns, problems, hopes, fears and dreams as the "hetero" community, our detractors will slowly shrink in the daylight of our real lives, becoming mere shadows of the ignorance they once espoused about what it is to be T, B, L, or G. The great thing for me is that I can go out and speak my piece, not for all Bs, but only about what my bi identity means to me, as an individual. I don't have to carry the weight of total representation alone on my shoulders.
The email I received yesterday was from the new program coordinator, asking for volunteers for the new season of speaking engagements. Work is so busy for me right now that I almost filed the email away without thinking about it - after all, these requests seem to be endless - until I reflected on how important it is to me to renew my commitment to education now that so much anti-queer sentiment is being raised constantly by the Federal and State governments. I know a lot of people who are burned out from constant activism, and the underlying insult that it is somehow "up to us" as a community to teach others tolerance and acceptance of us. This is the same underlying insult that whites unthinkingly throw out sometimes to acquaintances of color, demanding that they "educate" them about what it means to live with racial oppression.
I began volunteering as a way to participate in a queer outreach effort, because I have never felt included at any of the so-called LGBT events or groups in my area, and desperately wanted to touch base with other bisexual people, and to work to dispel many of the biphobic myths that seem to divide us further from our own so-called community. I grew up in a rural area and only came out once I reached graduate school, so I didn't have any role models or people to talk to about what I've always known to be true about myself, to confirm for me that I'm not alone, to hear about my struggles, uncertainty and isolation and support me anyway.
What did I know about myself? That I have always, always, always been bisexual. When did I know it? My coming-out story for panel speaking includes an anecdote about my kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Church, who entered my classroom on the first day of school and stood towering in the doorway, her red hair seeming to glow like a halo from the sunlight behind her. I was breathless, wondering who this glorious Amazon could be, and remember feeling drawn to her so powerfully I felt magnetized. I was four years old, and even then I sensed I was somehow different.
Fast-forward 32 years, and I'm still the same person, attracted not so much to a gender as I am to a person and the qualities that person embodies. For me, the Internet was immensely important in my ability to understand who I am, who and how I love, and what place I have in the world. It also freed me to be more than my body, and to connect to people apart from stereotypes, expectations and societal constraints. It allowed me to try on my identity for size, in an anonymous place that was free from the judgments of family.
What does it mean to me to identify as bisexual? It depends on which day you're posing the question, because it's a fliud construct that changes as I change over time. Today, it means being a self-possessed, self-confident, monogamous partner to a wonderful woman whom I love more than life itself. This weekend marks our 8th anniversary, and I am proud of our ability to overcome the prejudice, isolation and struggle that marked our early years together. My family thought it was a phase, that I'd eventually end up with some wonderful man. Her family thought it was sweet, but doomed to failure. Our relationship proved to be a myth-buster for them, and we enjoy a very loving and supportive relationship with our closest relatives.
More than anything, being bi has meant growing comfortable in my skin, and I think I have that in common with a lot of trans folks. I think we have a somewhat missed opportunity for solidarity between us, and it's my hope that we come together more around this shared experience and be there to support each other when the larger queer umbrella leaves us out in the rain.
Posted in Queer | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, September 14th, 2005
As Jay begins his journey into the proverbial "heart of darkness", my heart goes out to him and to everyone whom this tragedy touched. I give thanks in plenty to Jay for having the faith in me to ask me to blogsit. That being said...It's difficult to think about identity politics when so many of our brothers and sisters have suffered so much - and suffered more profoundly than they should have had to, given the disastrous Federal response to such an unprecedented storm. At times like this, I can draw no lines around who is in my community and who is not. I wish this same feeling extended to everyone, but sadly, I have read, heard and seen too much over the past few days to hold on to that naive belief.
I find myself agog at the growing divide between rich and poor, between homeless and housed, between black and white, between able-bodied and those who need a little more help...the country and its citizenry are being fractured anew along fault lines that have, clearly, never fully healed. At my favorite blog, Americablog [1], the sense of outrage and frustration is palpable. The anger is real. The targets have never been more clear than through the crosshairs of trust betrayed. The Germans have a wonderful compound noun to describe this: Weltschmerz. The feeling of all the pain and suffering in the world at once, in one person.
Accountability. Six syllables that mean more to our ability to come together out of tragedy than all of the eleventh-hour photo ops ever scheduled. Six syllables which carry the hopes of folks who share the same humanity, the same pain and grief beneath their skins that I do.
You can't have accountability without "BI". And that's why I'm here - to try and share my perspective of what it means to be bi in a society that does its best to divide us. I am drawing up a seat at the table, and I invite you all to join me...
Namaste.
[1] http://americablog.org/
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Tuesday, September 13th, 2005
I also thank Jay for the opportunity to help with his blog while he is serving the survivors of Katrina.
In 1928, the Mississippi River flooded. It started up north and came down the river. When it became obvious that New Orleans would not be spared, the powers that be broke the levee. They broke it in such a way that the poor neighborhoods were flooded, but the French Quarter was spared. In one period account, people gathered on the levee's waiting for rescue. And the rescue boats came. First, they took the white women and children. Then, they returned for the white men. Then, they never came back.
In many ways, we have never come back for many people. In the richest country of the world, an alarming percent live in poverty. In the city of New Orleans, the percentage of citizens living below the poverty level was 28%.
The Bible mentions poverty over THREE THOUSAND TIMES. How can Americans read the Bible with a pair of scissors, simply cutting out the parts that are inconvenient: such as the parts about providing for the poor? Instead, we provide tax cuts for the rich and cuts in services for the "least of these."
I've never been outside the US, so I will speak for us. Many times in our country, poverty is distributed along racial lines. We can't continue to ignore that. We can't continue to ignore poverty in any of it's manifestations. Perhaps it is the spiritual poverty of this theocracy that enables the poverty of it's people.
But the radical, inclusive Kindom of God (which as you know is what Jay has asked me to post about) doesn't allow for poverty or obscene levels of personal wealth. It ensures the needs of each person and the flourishing of the community. And yes, it was no typo when i said the Kindom of God. Isn't that what it is all about? Kin, in the broadest sense of the word, is the basis for our community.
Let's see how our country, government and citizen, continues to respond to Hurricane Katrina. That will be our measure for one generation. Will we love? Will we love for a moment? Will we put a band-aid on the problem, or will we look at poverty on a systemic level? Will we examine the intersection of poverty and racism? Or will we just pass by on the other side of the road as quickly as possible. Let's not only hope, but demand that we don't.
Ona
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Monday, September 12th, 2005
Thanks very much to Jay for letting me babysit his blog. For my first post, I thought I'd repost one of my many gender musings that first appeared on the Iron-On Line [1] in March 2004.
When I was about 11, I saw an episode of Casualty [2] featuring an apparent man who turned out to have a female body. I was fascinated that someone had invented a character so similar to me - I'd thought my quirk was unique to me until then. A week later, I read a letter from a viewer asking how dare the makers of Casualty portray a lesbian as deceiving and preying upon a heterosexual woman. I wanted to write and inform the viewer that they had misunderstood, but in the face of such righteous indignation I wondered whether I was the one that had misunderstood.A week after that, I read another letter informing the first viewer that the character in question wasn't a lesbian at all but a transsexual. It was probably the first time I came across the word, and certainly the first time I met it in the FtM context. And I felt slightly stupid, because I hadn't realised that was what the character was. I'd thought he was someone like me.When I had my blood test, I confided in the counsellor that I'd wanted to get pregnant because I was having trouble believing I was a proper woman. She gave me a big reassuring smile and explained that lots of women try for the whole family thing and later realise they prefer to be with women. It was OK to be a lesbian, but my kind of "not a proper woman" was hidden in the darkness. No-one understood it; no-one thought of it as a possible explanation.Whenever I hear FtMs described as butch dykes, it's like a knife. Just like I wanted to correct that letter-writer, I want to correct anyone who thinks a sex change is an easy way out for self-conscious lesbians. Not just because it's false, not just because it's ridiculous to anyone who's seen what gender reassignment entails, but because the more these views get aired, the harder it is for questioning people like me to find the information and reassurance we need.There may not be enough gay role models, but trans role models are even thinner on the ground, and FtMs seem to be the worst-represented of all. Every time I find someone who seems even vaguely "like me", I hang onto every word they say. When I was eleven, I believed my fears and coping mechanisms were unique. The discovery that they're not has opened my head right up, but while I believed that, I suffered. Needlessly.We need role models from everywhere on the gender spectrum. Every time some well-meaning feminist says that FtMs are butch dykes taking the easy way out, it becomes easier for someone like me, who doesn't feel female but isn't attracted to women, to decide they're alone in the world. How do you justify that? What does the feminist movement gain by claiming these guys as dykes?When I read a summary of My Beautiful Launderette [3], I found the concept of a gay racist thug intriguingly paradoxical. Surely someone who belonged to an oppressed group wouldn't want to be party to the oppression of another group? And this strikes me as being more of the same. Lesbian theorists claim transmen as their own, oblivious to how the guys feel about it. They try to take away a right they had to fight for themselves: the right to self-define.I don't get it. I probably never will get it. But kids growing up today have one advantage I missed: the internet. Those role models are there, if you know where to look, and even sometimes if you don't. A friend I met online came out trans to me, and after I'd picked myself up off the floor, one of my first responses was joy that a "guy like me" had written novels. The silence is breaking slowly, and FtMs that don't fit the "dyke in denial" mould one bit are there for us to see. It's progress.
[1] http://www.livejournal.com/~ksej
[2] http://www.bbc.co.uk/drama/casualty/
[3] http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091578/
Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment »
